Almost Here

I sat alone in my prison,
surrounded, overwhelmed, drowned in the memories of us.
There was no need to look at our pictures, or the video I did for you, the pieces of paper with your writing, or the cards which you gave me.
Because I remembered you with my mind and heart.

I closed my eyes, and then
through the haze of painful tears
I saw you.
In the darkness, you stepped out
right in front of me.

You,
Surrounded by a light so white
it blinded me, yet it did not hurt.
Eyes met, a pause, and then you smiled
a smile so tender, so gentle, so affectionate,
A smile so soft, it warmed my heart,
A smile which spoke a thousand words.

Slowly your hand rose, it reached out for me,
Your fingers uncurled, dancing in the light.
You stood so close; I could feel your warmth
Your familiar scent engulfed us in an invisible circle,
Unbreakable, untouchable.

I stared, unable to believe.
My hand rose to meet yours
Hesitatingly, but longingly.
Fingertips to fingertips,
so near, so close, almost touching
But

A tingle, a shimmer, a blurry wave.
Within a second, you dissolved into nothingness.
no sound, no disturbance, no nothing.
The light was gone, you were gone,
and all that is left is darkness.

I weeped, shattered.

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