Ineffable

The door latches shut, and then

I am huddled in a corner. The dress falls over my knees. Thick darkness engulfs. Where are the windows. The door has disappeared. I lean against the cold unyielding walls. Silence weighs heavily. I can’t breathe. There is a twist in my chest. I look down. The dress is crimson. It was white. Was it.. not? It spreads. I try to stop it. My hands stain wet. Blood black as night. Something guggles inside. Stop it. I press my eyelids shut. Open them again. I see nothing. I feel everything. Far away, a female is wailing. It is annoying. She won’t stop crying. Won’t stop sobbing. Shut up. Shut. Up. I press my damp palms against my ears. She gets louder. Where is my mobile. I need to text someone. Can she stop before I — . Oh. She is ME. It is my insides. It is my grief. It is internal. I can’t stop 

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